We live in a culture that focuses far too much energy on all the “what ifs” that may of may not happen in your life on a daily basis.
Our energy is either spent rehashing the past, and playing that tape over-and-over-and-over again, or we spend our precious focus on projecting the worst-case scenarios we can possible dream up.
Because that’s what we actually do … we dream them up.
For in reality, most of our conjured ‘what ifs’ have never even happened and we find ourselves using precious energy (and time) making up a bullshit story to make the daunting ‘what if’ plausible.
Most ‘what ifs’ are negative in the context and illustration. Such as: What if I fail? What if I go bankrupt? What if the sky falls? What if I get eaten alive? (OK, I know … I am being a bit ridiculous, but these are the stories we tell)
The common retort if you operate in a coaching mindset, as I do (and, I have often said this to my clients when they are spiraling fast in the abyss of ‘what ifs’) is to respond, “But, will you die?” or “Is that real? Really real? What’s the absolutely worst thing that could happen in this instance? And, what’s the probability of that actually happening? ”
We are doing nothing but telling ourselves stories when we allow the ‘what ifs’ (which often times are triggered by imposter syndrome) to take over, and then take us down. We spend countless hours obsessed in this space, too.
I mean, humans are fantastic storytellers. Now, before you tell me that you’re not a very good storyteller, let’s dig into this a little more …
Let’s look at all the excuses you create (yes, you do) … yep, stories. How about all the things you think you ‘can’t’ do … yep, stories. Or, all of the worst-case scenarios you entertain on the regular … yep, stories.
All stories. The amount of stories we tell ourselves … endless.
Humans are wired for stories. Whether you like it (or believe it) or not, you are constantly (and often time, unconsciously) telling yourself limiting stories and putting them on repeat.
These stories become your truth, your reality. And, rather than pause to ask, “Does this story really serve me or the future I wish to create?”, we succumb, hook, line and sinker, and let the broken record play.
The crazy part is that requires far more energy for you to create and maintain the bullshit story that goes with your daunting and dire ‘what if’ than you think … or, in the energy to play ‘imagine if’ instead.
I know that may seem counterintuitive, but it’s true.
You not only have to create the frame for the ‘what if’ to fit into and live (plant the actual seed), you also have to keep finding proof along the way to convince your brain this is true so that you mind doesn’t think it’s crazy.
Ah, the beauty and curse of freewill.
You see, the Universe will never interfere with your freewill. What you tell yourself, is what it is required to respond to and act on.
Your Mind (the one taking you down this slippery slope) does not know how to distinguish between what’s real versus what’s imagined. It only knows what you tell it (feed it) and holds onto that as its truth and reality.
The Universe is extremely obedient. It responds to what you choose to focus on. As the saying goes:
“What you think about and speak about, you bring about.”
100% true. Everything in your present life is a function of a thought and belief you held. One that you breathed life into and spoke about … even if just to yourself. Whatever you gave energy to (consciously or unconsciously) is being illuminated in the now.
So, if you are worrying about the ‘what ifs’ that might play out somewhere down the line, and constantly talking about what awful thing might happen to you, the Universe has to bring you something that aligns with that belief (and energetic vibration) so that you don’t think you’re crazy.
It works to prove you right.
Crazy, right. Or, perhaps it’s actually brilliant when we understand it and the power our own freewill and agency to decide what we focus on.
Imagine if you changed the frame. With a simple shift, you can start to align yourself with what you truly desire, not what you fear.